Die Bärliner - The Bard College Berlin Student Blog

My Induction into the Teenage Cliche: A poetry series



  

Laura Kuhn 1

Fall scene. Credit: Valerii Tkachenko

A poem to the boy who owes my heart some heavy-duty patches, and soon, before it heals all crooked
 

For awhile you were happiness

A type I had never tasted before

Somehow familiar –

like nutmeg and cinnamon,

fragrant and warm –

But somehow,

with laughter

words

a body and soul

Your taste was new

This happiness was …

more

 

You were like sunshine

that breaks the winter clouds

to kiss a smile onto the cold lips of those passing by

Never would those lips question your motives.

No one asks the Sun

Why?

 

Somehow, we had met already

When I held your hand in mine

and let my fingertips

glide along the surface of your palm

reading the story etched there, in those lines

I forgot whose skin was my own

Lost in a language no one speaks

never learns

Yet everyone knows

 

The language of silence

Demands no words

 

Instead,

it was your eyes that promised galaxies

Your smile that reminded me of honey.

You made me believe I was grasping infinity

 

Now, it seems

that your smile was too sweet

that your eyes promised too much

 

You were too kind:

You held me close

telling me I was “beautiful”

that what we had was “magical”

To not be scared

That the last thing you wanted was to hurt me

Telling me you cared

 

In your arms I closed my eyes

I was blissfully, willfully blind

As you fed me on a diet of lies

 

You were soda pop:

Too sweet to be healthy

And artificially bright

The fizzing bubbles of our conversation –

your words –

empty of substance

unbearably light

 

The taste of your memory, now,

in my mouth is bitter

You taste of metallic sadness:

You are unfamiliar.

 

 

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Don’t confuse broken feelings

or your ruffled feathers

with broken wings

Nor let the pain dragging you down today

keep you from falling in love again

and again

 

I promise you’ll rediscover the edge of love’s cliff

And, when you do stand there once more,

Not quite ready to jump,

Thinking “What if…?”

Think not of the ground below

But of the sky:

the possibilities it holds

The blue —

infinitely wide

 

I promise you’ll touch it

That, one day, it will catch you mid-stride

 

Next time!

Next time, the sky will catch in your wings

and buoy you up high

 

Next time, it will catch you

 

Don’t ask me how

Don’t ask me why

 

A poem for You

I have found happiness

Or maybe it found me

 

Listen:

 

Happiness is looking up

at the trees in autumn

Seeing the teetering of multihued leaves

on the brink of falling

from all they have known

to the waiting, solid ground below

 

It is smiling at strangers passing by

Sharing the little bit of sunshine

we all have inside

A silent exchange –

no words required

 

It is dancing alone

and off-beat

in your room, in your underwear:

Just moving your feet

 

It is dark chocolate,

or milk chocolate

(whichever you like best)

Savouring most of its warmth

then sharing the rest

 

It is star-gazing

cloud-watching

flower-picking

and first kisses

It is an undying belief

in the power of birthday wishes

 

It is laughing so hard

you begin to cry

 

It is knowing who loves you,

and not needing to know why

 

It is here to discover

You are here for it to find

All you have to do is look closely,

but, mostly,

Don’t hide

 

 

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